Wednesday, October 28, 2009

Thankful for Real Life

With life in the military, everything is temporary. If you like a duty station or not, you won't live there more than a few years. The jobs you have, churches you attend, social life, etc.-all temporary. When things are really bad(deployments) or more short term (1 year duty stations) things have the feeling of being not quite real. As if life is on vacation, and I am waiting for my "real life to begin." I think this is kind of the way school is treated as well. When you graduate from high school, "welcome to the real world!" Except then you go to college, where again, graduation is also "the real world." Which, I get that part of the exits from high school and college is an end to reliance on your parents' support. I think I've just kind of carried this with me into the rest of my life. Most of the time I've felt like this when Allen and I have been separated. For the most part, it's a coping mechanism. Job stinks? Lonely? Just wait, when we move/are reunited/whatever things will be better.

I definitely feel this way now. We will only be here for a year, and I don't love it. I'm not crazy about living in an apartment. I'm slow to make friends, so haven't really bothered doing it because we won't live here that long. I've been telling myself that it is just until the spring, then "real life can began." Part of my problem is that I set myself up for failure. We wanted to move close to family, so I went about 5 steps too far with dreaming. I thought about having family for birthday parties and seeing grandparents for the weekend. I've been feeling sorry for myself too long, and that's silly. That isn't to be right now, and that is ok. This IS real life, even if it isn't the life that I'd imagined for myself. I am going to focus on what is great right now, instead of just getting through life and thinking about all I am missing.

One way that I'm planning to do that is to write about the many things for which I am thankful. So, to begin:
  • Allen has a good job that enables me to stay home with my children for another year.
  • My daughter loves her preschool, both her teachers and her friends. I am grateful to have a place to take her which she loves.
  • My husband understood the importance of a good sewing machine. And, because I am home, I have time to quilt.
  • Autumn. My son is walking through crunchy leaves. We all are wearing jackets. Pumpkin soup (and muffins and pancakes,) molasses cookies, apple pie, and pecan bars.

8 comments:

The Dunns said...

Great perspective! Our next year is going to be very temporary for us, too. I'll try to remember this when I'm feeling stressed or rushed or impatient. This is real life!

Unknown said...

Great, positive post!

I would love some of your recipes!

Anonymous said...

We all need some positive perspective when real life is getting to feel too unreal - great post! I'm thankful for fall food too! but i need a good pumpkin muffin recipe - care to share?

The Capozzoli Clan said...

Angie....this sounds so much like me last year at this time. In fact, I think I blogged about it too! We chatted about it too on the phone. You are so right to be thankful for what you have and to be positive. I am thinking of you...and totally understand the crummy days. Keep smiling!

Emery Jo said...

beautiful reminder! thanks.

(PS. thanks for stopping by my bloggity blog!)

Myrtle said...

I have finally ,I hope try to go more with the flow and not worry too much about the little things, that can some time make you more crazy than the big things. Sounds like you have a great attitude. Keep the good thoughts.

Anonymous said...

I SO know what you mean Angie! We don't do things to our house "because we won't be here forever" or we don't buy that recliner we want because "it's another thing we'll have to move" etc etc. The list goes on and on. I agree, be thankful for what you have RIGHT NOW, but it sure will be nice to settle somewhere more permanently. I too have to remind myself to live for NOW, not for tomorrow. Take good care!

Anonymous said...

Grab your ticket and your suitcase
Thunder's rolling down the tracks
You don't know where you're goin'
But you know you won't be back
Darlin' if you're weary
Lay your head upon my chest
We'll take what we can carry
And we'll leave the rest

Big Wheels rolling through fields
Where sunlight streams
Meet me in a land of hope and dreams

I will provide for you
And I'll stand by your side
You'll need a good companion for
This part of the ride
Leave behind your sorrows
Let this day be the last
Tomorrow there'll be sunshine
And all this darkness past

Big wheels roll through fields
Where sunlight streams
Meet me in a land of hope and dreams

This train
Carries saints and sinners
This train
Carries losers and winners
This Train
Carries whores and gamblers
This Train
Carries lost souls
This Train
Dreams will not be thwarted
This Train
Faith will be rewarded
This Train
Hear the steel wheels singin'
This Train
Bells of freedom ringin'
This Train
Carries broken-hearted
This Train
Thieves and sweet souls departed
This Train
Carries fools and kings
This Train
All aboard

This Train
Dreams will not be thwarted
This Train
Faith will be rewarded
This Train
Hear the steel wheels singin'
This Train
Bells of freedom ringin'

Bruce Sprigsteen

as quoted by Bob/Dad/Pawpaw